When their disease progressed to the point of total insanity, I was totally insane too! I was trying to change something that I was powerless to change -- mainly, someone else. I was trying to "fix" someone else's problems, when only they could do that.
I was basically trying to argue with a disease! Trying to talk someone out of being sick. it was like saying, you should know better than to have diabetes!!! When I finally understood and accepted that the alcoholic was addicted to something they were also allergic to and they were just as powerless as I was over it; and they needed help, support and encouragement just like I did, I was able to separate the alcoholic from the alcoholism.
For my own serenity, I have made the choice not to live around the active disease. I am able to offer understanding and encouragement to the alcoholic, because I understand today, I truly do.
But I also understand that alcoholics will never get better unless I detach myself from trying to fix them and allow them find their own way into recovery. I can not continue to maintain anything near serenity, if I allow myself to be engulfed in THEIR problems.
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