Pamela and the Maine Woods
Recently I spent five days "roughing" it in a remote but modern summer "camp" surrounded by Maine woods, the waters of a pristine lake visible through the branches of evergreens, beech, birch, maple, ash and more. After dark the loons' plaintive calls floated across the lake, occasionally punctuated by the hooting of owls.
|
|
The other world was captured within the pages of the biography I was reading--the British Isles, Europe, and the United States between the early 20s and today, a world of opulence and privilege, a backdrop for the remarkable life of Pamela Digby Churchill Hayward Harriman, whose final years were spent as the American Ambassador to France.
I had to chuckle at the contrast between sitting on a porch in a rocking chair, the recipient of treasures gathered by carefree children -- tiny hemlock cones, a pebble wrapped with a leaf -- and, in effect, being a voyeur with ringside seats at Pamela Churchill's many romantic conquests -- Edward R. Murrow, Aly Khan, W. Averell Harriman, John Hay "Jock" Whitney, William S. Paley, Gianni Agnelli, Baron Elie de Rothschild, Stavros Niarchos, et al -- clearly a 20th century courtesan (French for prostitute whose liaisons are primarily within court circles) -- most of whom showered her with costly gifts, even cost-of-living stipends after the affair was history.
Contrasting Environments
What is amusing me even more than the contrasting environments and the monetary value of the love offerings she was given by her paramours and the ones I received from the innocence of loving children is why I chose the biography as the only book to accompany me on my much-needed mini-vacation: I knew the book had received excellent notices and that she had an extraordinary life (she died in February), and reading about her hobnobbing with some of the best-known international socialites of recent history would be easy, even mindless reading. There would be nothing to remind me of my work in the self-help/recovery field.I was right, and I was wrong. The scholarship of the author, Sally Bedell Smith, is outstanding -- hundreds of interviews and Notes numbering 452. The biography can be likened to a People-like magazine but one with a post-doctoral education.
Otherwise, the story is rife with dysfunctional families, including Winston Churchill's. There's alcoholism, emotional neglect, domestic violence, drug abuse, etc. Morality, especially during the giddiness and urgency of bomb-besieged London, went out the window along with the flying glass. With the exception of her final years as a political activist, which I'm still reading, the profile of Pamela is a study of codependency carried to an art form.
|
|
Maybe there's an up side to codependency.
More from Donna
Previous guest columns written by Donna Thompson for the Alcoholism site.
As always, your comments or questions are welcomed. If you would like to receive a very short and FREE newsletter about updates to this site and other news, just send a note to Buddy T.
