Tradition 6: Cooperation?
I moved to a new town and frankly it took me a while to get around to going to the only Al-Anon meeting in the area, for various different reasons, but I finally made it after a long time away from the rooms.I was comforted to hear the familiar opening read along with the preamble, the steps, and traditions. But when the chairman asked if anyone had anything they wished to discussed, my comfort soon disappeared. I sat in amazement as I listened to the members of the group plan the menu and discuss arrangements for the up-coming A.A. speakers meeting!
Well, being new to the group and not wanting to get off on the wrong foot, I decided to just listen. But when they got to the part about who was going to bring which covered dish and where was the best place in town to buy prepared cole slaw, I raised my hand!
As gently as I could, I tried to explain if they as individuals planned to attend the A.A. speaker's meeting and wanted to help with the arrangements, that was fine, but they should discuss it after the meeting. I explained that during the actual meeting, it was against tradition to even announce that there was going to be an A.A. meeting of any kind, because A.A. was a separate entity.
I had hoped someone else in the room would speak up and say, "Yes, he's right!" But it didn't happen. You could have heard the proverbial pin drop at the A.A. meeting in the building next door!
Well, reminding myself of my very own words to newcomers in the past to "try at least six meetings before making up your mind" and decided to return to the room the following week. The first topic for discussion? A member announced that she had just received in the mail a copy of the latest Codependency guru's video and asked if there was a VCR available so that we could all watch it!
Thankfully the video equipment was locked up tight, but when the member then proceeded to tell the group about the content of the video, I found myself raising my hand again against my better judgement.
Again, I tried to explain that "codependency" was a professional or therapuetic term and was not an Al-Anon topic or issue and that the word "codependency" did not appear anywhere in Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. When that comment was met with blank stares, I added that the opening that the chairman read specifically mentioned that the group conscience requested that we refrain from the use or mention of non Conference Approved Literature.
This time my comments were not received silently. I was basically shouted down on the spot. I supposed the group conscience then and there decided that codependency was an appropriate topic of discussion, because they continued with their discussion.
Needless to say, I did not keep coming back to that particular meeting.
Codependency is a issue, but it is not an issue for discussion during an Al-Anon meeting. When a group's discussion becomes dominated by outside issues, it robs individual members of their meeting time.
Buddy
More about Tradition 6
Tradition 6: Outside Enterprises
"In order to preserve the integrity of the program, 12 step support groups do not endorse any outside organizations and causes."Staying Focused
"We should keep strictly with this prinicpal in order to keep us as individuals focused on our primary purpose."
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