Step 1: A Rude Awakening

I was born and raised in THE major Midwestern city. My parents were both 30 when I was born, and my father had a good job with a good future. My mother was a college grad, two degrees, four languages and Phi Beta Kappa (high honors) from an Ivy League school. Both were highly intelligent people.

My father was a drunk. My mother's father was a drunk. Her sister's husband was a gambler. The cycle of dysfunction was in place long before I was born. And so I naturally became first a drug abuser (a product of my times) and later a drunk.

Graduated to Drugs

I graduated to drugs in high school. I found that I had few friends, a fat boy from a dysfunctional and poor (yes, my father's lifestyle had devastated us financially) Christian family, and here I was in a well-to-do Jewish area where I was not welcomed by other kids with open arms. Having drugs, making them available to other kids, made me popular. So in reality, ACCEPTANCE was the key to my foray into substance abuse.

I got busted at 16, went to the juvi hall for a night. I flunked a year in high school and went 5 years to graduate. I went to college (afraid of Nam) and it took me 11 years and 4 schools to get a degree, drinking all the way. I heard voices and had nightmares, saw a shrink for 2 years. My mother, the shrink, my friends, co-workers, and family all told me that I was drinking too much. All the signs were there. Still I would not listen.

In 1984 I got a great job with a great company. I stopped the therapy, became relatively important, drank even more heavily. I took a test to be a cop, passed it, and by 1985 they hired me. I was too hung-over to report for duty. That was okay, I still had a great job. I woke up a week later hearing those damned voices again. As I reported in my discussion on Step 2, this scared the living daylights out of me.

HP Did the Rest

That was May 4, 1985. How much has life improved since? Today I am married, with 2 kids. I have a job so much better than the one I mentioned above, I make lots more money, work 10 minutes from home, and have more time off. I have real friends, my family talks to me. I am a homeowner, with three cars, and now my wife and I are looking at another house with 50% more space. We are not debt free, but have sufficient money to cover our debts.

Over the years I have worked the steps, "Practiced these principles" (or tried to) in all my affairs, and did what I was told. Go to meetings, get a sponsor, work the steps, and help others.

It worked for me. I can't speak for anybody else. I can't sit here and say "if it worked for me it will work for you" because I know that isn't true. I can only say that I am grateful for everything AA has done for me, and indeed, I owe everything I have to AA.

You see, all I did was not drink. AA and HP did the rest.

Sox

Step 1: Honesty
After many years of denial, recovery can begin when with one simple admission of being powerless over alcohol -- for alcoholics and their friends and family.

Unmanageable
"I actually asked, What do you mean my life is unmanageable?"

Stop The Pain
"At the end of my drinking, I could only manage to ask for help. I had given my adult life to drinking."

Illusion Of Power
"I had to admit and still do, that on my best day, I could do nothing about my loved-one's drinking."

A Relief
"The first step has lead me to an unbelievable life. The first step was the beginning to help me believe in a higher power."

Toward Serenity
"Today I don't have to admit that I am powerless over alcohol everyday of my life -- I get to admit it! There is so much freedom in that spiritual concept."