The Risks of Staying
I have had two divorces due to alcohol abuse, both of which also had physical abuse.
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I am an alcoholic and a physical abuse victim survivor.I was sober in my last break up and he was dry and became very abusive and I had to have him removed from the house for my safety as well as my two month old son's safety.
In the chapter "To the Wives" in the Big Book (Alcoholics Anonymous), it says often to stay with the alcoholic (unless it is abusive). However, if our co-founders were around today I don't think that they would mean for the spouse to stay and wait for God to sober up the alcoholic and turn one's cheek at infidelity if they were aware of AIDS and other social problems we have today.
I think they would have revised the book, pushing a stronger point of tough love and would have put the alcoholic out of the family until one made the choice to do something about one's disease.
There are alot more risks in staying with the alcoholic today than there were when the founders were around such as AIDS, more DWI's and death-related victims via vehicle manslaughter. When the alcoholic has no one to point the finger at, they are likely to look at their problem.
God Bless and Love All Ways,
Alethea A.
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