In the same boat
- I have tried everything imaginable, nothing works. Now I am on the verge of a breakdown. I will end this relationship before it ends me! An alcoholic needs to hit bottom hard, unfortunately for some, bottom is death. They hardly ever change, maybe 1 in a million gets sober & stays sober. If you have given it your best effort and it didn't work, get rid of the problem, take care of yourself (because the alcoholic won't take care of you) and move on. Life is too short.
- —Guest mdltwngirl
Comeback?
- Married 30 years 4-kids. Husband started to drink 7 years ago. Says stress/life concerns. He became a selfish self absorbed blaming angry, bitter monster. He had always been quiet but loving to his children and me. However, never a great communicator. When he drank he became a loud mouthed fool. Two DUI's, hurt and damaged relationships with family and friends who offered love and support during this awful period of time did not spark a desire to quit. I tried every way to help to save him from himself and alcohol. We begged, pleaded, prayed, and sought out support groups. Finally, I decided what I wanted for him, was not what he wanted for himself. Reluctantly, I divorced him. He started to change back soon afterward. Presently he has not had a drink in over a year. He is always helping his children and friends. How long will this last? He wants his life back, and seems to be aware of the emotional, and financial damage done. I however am terrified the Hell will start again. Drained.
- —Guest cantkeepup
Alcoholic mom
- I'm only 24 years old and I think my mom is an alcoholic I don't know what to do, right now I'm in my room sobbing. She's already started drinking for the night. I tied sneaking in and putting one full cup of a mix of all types of pickle juice in her vodka she notices but then goes out and buys more. I've tried talking to her a little but nothing works. I need help. Maybe I'll go to an Alateen meeting at my school, but I don't want to be embarrassed because of my mom's drinking. I have no idea what I can do I need help.
- —Guest Lost kid
Opening my eyes
- I have been living with an alcoholic for about 3 years now. When we first got together it was just a night out together and a few drinks there you go, but soon he let me in his world. He was used to drinking nearly everyday with his "friends" they would start Friday after work and drink almost non-stop until Monday morning. Our relationship began to take the back burner. My needs were not as important as drinking with his friends. When ever he and his friends would say, oh we are just running over here for a second, in their lingo it meant that you would be lucky if they would be back that night. I have pleaded with him, I have yelled at him, I have acted as though everything is just fine and each time it just goes in one ear and out the other. I am so tired and fed up with the whole situation. What can you do?
- —Guest So Lost and Hurt
Parents
- Both parents are alcoholics: mum's a binge drinker for a month every now and then and my dad drinks everyday worse when my mum is too. My mum only stops drinking when's she's ready and my dad has never stopped. He makes me do everything and it's getting me down I have my GCSE to do and I can't take it anymore
- —Guest Teenager
Oh yes, I've tried
- My Husband of 17 years, now divorced 18 years. My son who is now 29 and actively drinking. My daughter who is now in recovery. My brother who is actively drinking.
- —pawma55
In love with him, but know it will end
- I am so torn as I read these posts. They all sound like me and mimic my thoughts. I am madly in love with this man. We have a 1 year old daughter. He is an awesome father and the best teammate in life I could ask for. Supportive, builds my self confidence, and makes me feel like the only woman in the world. His drinking however is dangerous to my child. I have to make rules in my house like "no drinking while you are caring for the baby." And after 2 DUI's you would think he would drink and drive anymore but that isn't the case. I have caught him many times trying to leave the house. I feel like I need to leave before something happens to my child. If she fell and hurt herself because he wasn't being attentive, would he be able to forgive himself, esp. if it was serious? I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if something happens to her because I feel like I should have left a long time ago. He won't recognize he has a problem.
- —Guest Torn
My parents fight
- My mom and dad drink sometimes like any other people do. But sometimes they drink way to much and they get drunk. When that happens they start to fight and yell at each other in front of my 11 year old sister. She thinks this is all going to be over in the morning. The thing she doesn't get is that this has been going on all my life for 17 years. I can't take it any more. I want my parents to stop drinking and fighting it is tearing this family apart. It is also making me insane. Can any one help me, I need a normal teenage life.
- —Guest Bannana
He's killing himself
- I have been with my husband for 5 years so far, he drank a lot ever since we got together. But its only gotten worse. His Father passed away last year and he was very close to him. When his father passed away he started to drink everyday and has been drinking 2 cases of beer non stop for a whole year. It scares me because he has Cerebral Palsey and when he doesn't have a drink his legs shake, and are very weak. He doesn't take showers without me making him and he won't eat. he just drinks more and more. He's only 25 years old and he is very hateful and can't stand up when is drunk or sober. I have tried to tell him over and over that he's going to kill himelf if he doesn't quit or at least slow down. He keeps me isolated in our home Because he doesn't want me to leave him. I love him very much and wouldn't leave him. I want to help him, but how do you help someone who doesn't want help? He has told me he doesn't want children; he would rather drink his beer than be a father. So I'm going to keep trying.
- —Guest scared wife
Dont see the point of all the posts
- Where is there a resolution for this..I just cant take his drinking anymore..
- —Guest Pennielaynze
I am lost
- My child's father is an alcoholic. we met when we were 18. I came from a nice family, didn't know signs of a problem when I saw them. Didn't know there were people in the world who valued the contents of a bottle over human life! It's been almost 6 years now. We love each other. that I do not doubt. But love is not enough. it's just not enough. he has recently stopped drinking. seems to have his priorities straight. but i am terrified. Everything reminds me of what he did when he drank. can't forget. I try to cover it with new and better memories. but all day everyday things take me back, and I'm a scared pregnant 18 year old girl again who doesn't know what to do. We are making a go of it again. Three weeks now and so far he's doing really well. but what about when he's not. I'm scared to let my son get attached. should I just cut him out? can I do that to my child? Can i do anything BESIDES that for my child? I love my child dearly. But I'm tired of being alone, too.
- —Guest single parent
Child Of An Alcoholic
- As a child my parents would drink a lot then get into arguments, my dad would lash out at mum I would see my mum lying on the floor then in tears and my dad screaming in her ear and dragging her across the floor he would then take his alcoholic violent rages out on me by screaming at me to get to bed and then smashing my little Lego sets. Growing up my dad was never really there for me, always out at the pub and always not in he mood or too drunk to take me anywhere. I could go on for hours about the stuff he has done to me and annoyed me over the years, but that would take 4 pages. Now I am 29 and hate my dad I still see him drink everyday of the week. He is messed up in the head. He sits and drinks alone and no-one in the family can really talk to him civilized. It's just him and the bottle. I hate alcohol. You're right, it is a demon. I guess that's why it's called the devils buttermilk
- —Guest Andy MC
Both parents are alcoholics.
- I recently just turned 15, and for 15 years of my life both of my parents were and still are alcoholics. It seems like the same exact thing every night, both my parents would come home around 7:30, pour a glass of beer/vodka/wine or whatever devilish drink they can get there hands on. Then go outside and smoke a cigarette for 2 hours. Just to walk themselves into a trap of them yelling and screaming about our past. I've tried things like pouring all of the alcohol and liquor out. But they just keep doing it. I could never send them to rehab because money is way to tight and we would be out on the streets within a month. I love my parents to death and all, but its almost to the point I would rather live in a foster home to live a life not ruled by alcoholics and there blinded decisions.
- —Guest Disclosed
There's a time when it's time to go
- I just left my boyfriend of 6 years. Over the years he's said that he wants to stop drinkng, but he doesn't. More recently he's acknowledged that he has a problem, that once he starts drinking he just can't stop. He's talked about quitting altogether when he's sober, and then he's drunk again. He gets angry at me when I have a disapproving look or make a comment about his drinking. But I see this huge contradiction and I feel like I can't just stand by. I've done that for too long, and I will no longer enable his behaviour. Now he's often angry and hurtful when he's drunk. In our last conversation, I tried to get him to acknowledge my position, what am I supposed to do? Leave him alone, he says. I support the changes he says he wants to make, but HE has to DO something. He's upset that I left, but when he was drunk he said he was done with me, and done talking about it, so how was it worth staying? I so hope that he decides to do get help. He's a wonderful person, when he's not drunk.
- —Guest sad, but it had to be done.
She will not stop- no matter what
- I'm 14 going to be 15 soon and I've been dealing with my mom's illness since iIve been in 3rd grade. I tell her all I can to make her stop. I'll make her cry, and she says she's done for good. But the next week she's at it again. She does it at night while on chat rooms. She's embarrassed me countless times in front of my friends. I feel like she's never going to stop and die from this. (I've told her that too) I bet if you ask me if I've tried something, I've most likely have. I just need someone to talk to and get advice. She's done everything as in side affects : seizures, passed out, mumbling, dosn't remember a thing. It hurts me. Please help me and my family.
- —Guest Katie
