Need to learn not to drink
- I have always known that alcohol is something that I have a difficult time controlling and that it sometimes takes over my life in a flash. It's just so weird how one minute you are going to the gym regularly and not even thinking about the wine store when you walk past it on your way home and the next minute you haven't been to the gym in months because you have been passing it up to go home and sit in front of the TV drinking bottles of wine, feeling depressed and trapped and watching your belly get fatter and fatter as you sit there helplessly wondering what is going on! I have been lethargic and depressed for years, over-medicated for Bipolar. Now I'm getting off of Depecote, which makes you exhausted and overly hungry and taking a risk to be on less medication. Only thing is, if I want to succeed in this, I'll have to not drink because it will destabolize me and I won't have the intense mood stabolizer to protect me. I don't know how to convince myself that its time to stop.
- —Guest Guest Lily
- I have been from a 12 week re-hab program only 6 weeks now. After about 8-9 weeks into the program, I had what i experienced or what i think it is a 'spiritual awakening'. I felt so good from deep within, so happy and so calm. I felt really happy from the inside out and all my conscience was clean. I went in rehab for cocaine and benzo addiction, mainly cocaine. As soon as I was out, the second day, thought id have a drink. I have now drew the conclusion that alcohol is the source of my problem 'any mind altering substance'. I was in denial about this throughout the program. I know what i have to do, i know i should be working at the program even for a little each day, and go to meetings. Why why why does it seem so hard to have to take myself to meetings when this is what is going to save me. I have been to about 3 in 6 weeks, and used the meetings to justify to myself that im going to be ok. Things are getting worse and i know i need to get real. Actions speak louder! Thanks
- —Guest Marmc
- I get angry, and can't put my finger on why. Yes, sometimes something angers me, and I know what it is; but this anger that pops up constantly, is baffling! The serenity prayer, and talking to people, and my sponsor, and knowing I am not the only crazy one here, are things that help. Still.... I can't understand the anger, and so can only pray God, please remove it. the serenity prayer is my absolute favorite! Peace.
- I have found family and friends to be one of the largest triggers. Esp if the person is returning from rehab.
- —Guest Lanieboo
Go to meetings
- To avoid "triggers , or relapse go to AA or NA 12 step meetings. Each day. Every 24 hours. The program is run on God's GRACE. Not words from family or friends, we have to "turn it over to the CARE of God, His Grace" Step 3. We ARE allergic to alcohol. We have a gene in our DNA that won't digest it. So , triggers? I ignore them and go to the next thought, or action CONSTANTLY asking for the "Higher Power's WILL" and avoiding the first drink and first usage , at all moments of the 24 hour day. The reality of relapse will bring all recovering people to their knees and a firm return to meetings , REGULAR Meetings. To Help others and well as be reminded where we came from , and where we can go. I also like NA "we ask for more of the good things that the NA fellowship holds for us" and I like AA "apart from divine help, we are hopeless". I learned that "the phenomenon of craving" from the first usage or first drink, is too much. GO TO Meetings.
- —Guest SoberGuy
- Money in my pocket, it is like I start thinking of where and what I am going to drink. And then comes the thoughts of using my other drug of choice, cocaine and I m out seeking it as well. I realise that there are other factors to concider for my useage but the facts are this is my biggest trigger.
- —Guest DWG
- I am 2 weeks and 2 day sober (this is my 3rd weekend, YAY!). What kills me is how the media portrays alcohol. It's on almost every show. It is glorified and made to seem "the norm". No, you don't have to drink a glass (or in my case, bottle) of wine to be classy. I'm not sure what my triggers really are yet. I am thinking maybe vacation time, my son's upcoming wedding, particularly stressful workdays...I can only prepare myself mentally for these challenges and cross that bridge when I get there. This is a journey so far, and I must admit, I'm digging it!
- Anger will trigger me big time. I have three responses to anger run away, shut down or explode. I have been sober for one year. I used to drink away my anger..Now, I call my sponsor and/or go to a meeting.. I also journal. That helps a lot!
- My wife's alcoholism. The worst! It didn't, but only because I realized my wife Has finally drank more than me. It disturbs me my 20+ son is showing signs that predict a severe Problem. My youngest who attends a Christian college ( zero tolerance. )turns 21 in 1 month. She has asked why our family is so screwed up. After 8 years sober l am still in denial. My only hope is telling her she is an adult child of alcoholic parents and beseech her on my knees to never drink and let her know that by never drinking there's a 0 chance of becoming an alcoholic. We stop because it hurts us. We stay sober because we now know it will hurt others.
- —Guest poachild
- You can do it. Nothing worthwhile ever happens quickly and easily.
- —Guest Ron
Two Cycle engine oil...
- After 8 months of sobriety, I went up north to go snowmobiling w some friends( Who are non drinkers .) When I used to drink I always was snowmobiling. So low and behold the smell of the exhaust from a snowmobile(the 2 cycle oil burning smell )triggered me to tell the guys while we were all around the bonfire and cooking burgers, that I had to gas up my sled cause it was almost empty. I went to the liquor store and bought a fifth and pounded it down and washed it back w a soda. Now to this day I am aware that that smell will trigger a craving in me and I am ready for it. This may sound nuts,but were all a little crazy anyhow. Thanks Terry
- —Guest Terry
Help Me Jesus, Help me Jesus
- I can only write that I pray for other addicts with the LOVE which I have been given for all people. When I don't do this every minute of every day & night I am thinking about myself instead, that's my relapse trigger- thinking about me instead of you. My alcoholism is so simple & so complicated. I began as soon as I responded to Dad's summons for another beer then I could get as much as I wanted- age @5 to 58. So now they know that "trauma" is my real problem. So I'll strip my soul bare again in these terms to try and help myself. But today I can only look at my drinking as one big relapse, because all of life I don't know of anything else but drinking something anything stops the hurt a little bit less than all the PAIN which is my life. Think only of somebody else.
- —Guest Barbara
Relapsed after 1-1/2 years and 21 months
- I totally understand what your saying Chrissy. It's hard to get back to feeling a part of the meetings. I know I need to go in order to stay sober but it's hard. Actually it gets harder the more times you relapse. I just keep praying for the willingness and for the obsession to be removed. Also, I pray that I have another spiritual awakening again. That I can get back on that pink cloud. That's the best feeling, That's when you crave meetings and feel a part of again. Just pray, and try to get more spiritual. That's what I'm doing.
- —Guest Carmex
Learning to embrace change!
- People, Places, Things ! The first two are kind of easy to fix when you ask yourself is this relationship or place beneficial or damaging to me and the other. Paying attention to your feelings, thoughts and realizing what they are and how to deal with them. Also working the 12 steps or learn ways to maintain Sobriety. The main thing is learning how you work on all levels and finding ways to prevent what leads to relapse. When I said things it was a big thing! Smells, seasons, time schedules, stress, even music. It took me to learn what thoughts relate to what experience, memory or current feeling at the time, and what it was TIME to understand them. This is much growth but can become interesting and healing. Recovery isn't always comfortable but learning skills to deal with the uncomfortable in a healthy way is good. Just abstaining can ease some of the damage but dealing with what got you where you started to see what isn't working can lead to understanding the world of you.
- —Guest Dawn E. Bedell
Can't get any sleep
- After a night or two of very little sleep, I think that a few drinks will help. They do knock me out, but a few hours later I am in the same situation again. I remind myself that it is better to be tired in the morning than hungover, and there are natural remedies for insomnia. Like Brand-new@this, music can be a trigger too; especially music that reminds me of a lost loved one. I don't listen to those songs anymore. Stay strong.
- —Guest Guest Anne