Freedom
- For years I allowed myself to slowly become the person that I was so angry with, my alcoholic father. Ruined one marriage and determined not to lose another. I went sober for 3 years and picked the bottle back up with a mind that I could handle my drinking, but once again it started to handle me. Although I was able to hide it from many of people, just couldn't fool myself. Pray for me as I do for you all. I'm starting right now, one day at a time.
- —Guest Mr. Change
Considering going back to the rooms
- Ive read over 100 posts now and its making me want to hit a meeting tommorow and try again. 22 years old and have been in 2 28 day programs and three outpatients since i started drinking at 16. the past three years have been out of control. im high functioning now, taking five classes at school with straight a.s and working thirty hours a week. working the 4-10 shifts helps because no one can smell my breath from my night before. i come home after work and get in bed with a twelve pack every night. only get up to piss and once a week pass out without pissing and piss my bed. i feel lately since ive been so productive holding a job and doing well and school that there is no problem but i know there still is. have had 3 arrests in the past all due to drinking, fortunate enough to still be allowed to join the army when i had no where else to turn and my drinking got me kicked out of there. u guys have helped me decide im going to hit a meeting tommorow night. im doing it right
- —Guest g
Why I gave up drinking
- I gave up because alcohol was consuming me piece by piece. Hours and days and years dissolved in booze. The night sweats and morning self loathing too vile to bear. Watching my face bloat and redden. Knowing it would kill me if I carried on the toxic relationship. It mirrored my old unhealthy relationships with abusive men and eating disorder. It was the last toxic relationship I had to jettison in order to accept that I choose love.
- —Guest Frances
My luck will run out...
- I have been an alcoholic for 26 years. I have tried to quit before but was in denial of my addiction. This past weekend a guardian angel must have been looking out for me...I was in a foreign city drunk to the point of blacking out and somehow ending up miles from my hotel. If it wasn't for a young woman who picked me up and brought me to my hotel, I don't know what would have happened. Arrested or worse who knows! I have a young family at home that I won't jeopardize not being in the remainder of their life. Thanks for reading my post. I hope that this helps others in my situation. Day 2 of sobriety.
- —Guest Tired
Peter
- I retired to Italy and met ex-pats who had also moved and they drank like fishes. They disgusted me and made me and I was embarrassed by them because Italians just don't over drink. But at first I went down the same route. The booze was cheap and I had no work to worry about. So I could wait until noon to start drinking. Then I would sleep if off and start again. Drinking seriously into the evening. I felt dreadful. Even in the face of my freedom from work and money worries I felt anxious and depressed. Then I started to become offensive. There's no excuse for snapping at people you love. And I realised I couldn't handle it so being an all or nothing person I stopped. And have done for over three months. With no intention of returning to it. What liberation. Why didn't I do it years ago? Just don't expect too much - feeling healthy is really feeling normal. Not being fuddled, argumentative and sticky is a great feeling. And I no longer dig holes for myself!
- —Guest Peter Knights
fed up
- 51 and fed up of feeling anxious,deppressed,tired for three days after drink.its gotta stop.wish me luck.
- —Guest dennis
I quit because I was desperate
- I quit because I was alone,confused, mentally ill, stuck, afraid and couldn't stop. I stole things, used people, hated myself and could no longer do the things I used to enjoy. Every day I drank. I stayed up for days. I hated myself, But GOD loved me enough to see my desperate condition and got me into a chair at AA>
- —Guest My name is SOBER
Thank you
- Thank you everyone. I have read every single story here and can relate to so many of them. I too have: urinated/vomited on myself, put myself in dangerous situations, lied about how much I drank, lost jobs, injured myself, fought with others, blacked out more times than I can count, sexually assaulted and raped, and was nearly homeless. If not for my boyfriend/best friend coming into my life when he did I don't know where I'd be right now- on the street, dead, who knows... He saved me and for almost two years I still continued to do this to myself/us. For some reason he stuck with me and for that I am grateful. 3 days sober today and counting. Thank you again for sharing your stories, it has been helpful to know that I am not alone in this struggle. Good luck to everyone out there dealing with their demons- YOU CAN PUT THEM TO REST!!!
- —Guest CMB
Quitting is so empowering
- I had been getting horrible migraines and hangovers from drinking that were getting worse and lasting longer. I often don't drink for 4 or 5'days sometimes a week after one of these episodes but on MLK weekend, I decided to not resume again for as long as possible. Was a heavy drinker for 30 years:20s,30s,40's. I was one of the lucky ones. No DUI s, but I drove drunk after parties, no divorce, I married a man who drinks very little but I knew I was playing with fire and had a father and brother who are alcoholics. Instead of drinking every night, I've had one glass of wine for a special occasion with a friend and as good as it tasted at the time, I did not go home and have another 2 or 3 because it had been 5 weeks of not drinking anything and sleeping like a baby and waking up refreshed and never feeling out of control or embarrassed. the thing is, I would go to a party and my glas would never be empty all night. I just couldn't keep up with myself anymore. Virgin margaritas
- —Guest Chris
It was time
- My taste of alcohol began at a very young age. In church, as an alter boy. I was 8 years old. 38 years later, my routine was to down three shots before I would say "Honey, I'm home". I hated the stigma. I hated who I became. I hated the way I felt. I hated the extra 100 lbs I put on. I hated having no freedom. I hated my poor financial situation. I envied happy people. I envied healthy people. I envied life. It's been 7 months. I feel like a champ now, lost 30 lbs, friends are now following my lead and I can wake up each morning refreshed. I
- —Guest Greg
No alcohol stop anxiety
- It can be hard at gatherings with alcohol and when I think about drinking. I take a step back look and really listen to people who are under the influence of alcohol. It just confirms I made the right choice I do not want to look or act like a stupid ass drunk anymore. I feel sorry for alot of drinkers because I know when they wake up tomorrow they will feel embarrassed. So when I go to a social alcohol event it just makes me very happy its not me doing stupid stuff or making bad choices anymore. k and really look and listen
- —Guest deb
Better times ahead.
- It's been 6 months. I quit cold turkey and on my own after years of drinking a fifth every 2 days. The craving for the actual alchohol went away rather quickly, but the social implecations still bother me a lot. For example, two events recently, both work related, had people all around me drinking. I was offered drinks, but declined. I still feel like I owe everyone an explantion why I am not drinking. The social anxiety is very hard to endure. I avoid anywhere where drinking will be, but that is not always practical. I am proud that I have a new direction in life. I never felt better phsycally. I have a clear mind. But when social gatherings are there, I am one loner that stands in the corner when I used to be the life of the party. I had a 100 reasons to stop drinking. I only have one reason to start back up: Social anxiety. It's a killer and I need help in those situations. I am so glad I did quit. WOW, life is grand! 6 months.
- —Guest Greg
I could not do it any more.
- I reached a point where I knew that if I continued to drink it would kill me. It would not be quick however, it would be long, painful and it would hurt the people who loved me deeply. My moment of clarity was the deep understanding that I did not have the right to inflict that upon them. Having been sober once before for over a decade, there was no question about what to do. That was over four years ago and I have not regretted or doubted me decision once in this time. I value, respect and enjoy my sobriety immensely and have an immense amount of gratituded ?
- —Guest Christopher
embarrassed again
- Had a company party and again had too many drinks and blacked out and am embarrassed and appauled at myself.At times I blame the suicide of my husband 6 years ago but realize that's just another excuse. I'm 51 and been drinking since 16, time for a change. Positive thoughts my way please.
- —Guest repeat
Tired of being my worst enemy
- I only made bad choices when I drank. Been sick for a year now to many health issues to name. But when I looked in the mirror and saw the enemy 15 days ago I begged GOD to help me. Still struggling day to day I want to live I'm not letting the enemy back in my soul. The truth set me free
- —Guest dee
