Lost in NOLA
- I've been on this site for 3yrs now. Been to rehab twice and I just fall back into the drama of drinking. It is a culture down here, always a party, parade, or function to attend and we never close our bars; at least not most of them. I have spent too much money on help, and the bottom line is that I do not know how to live a sober life. I taper off and then get scared that my heart is going to explode, so back to square one again. I had to change my linens every morning because they were soaked from my semi-detox the night before because I did not drink enough. Of course sleep eludes me and the nights are horrible just laying there and perspiring. I cannot wait for daylight, then I wish for the night. I really have come to the end of this rope I have been dangling from for too many years. Everything I read here is a mirror of what I have been through these last three years. I do not want to die; my face is puffy and I feel horrible most days. I look in the mirror and hate me.
- —Guest Lost in New Orleans
- Consider yourself very lucky you avoided major withdrawals. Everyone is different in their recovery, both physically and emotionally. It really depends on the individual. Myself, I was only drinking everyday, morning to night for four months(my lowest). But I was a weekend binger for most of my adult life. During those horrible 4 months I was also addicted to sleeping pills, so basically addicted to two kinds of sedatives. I got so bad, I had to have a few drinks just to feel normal to avoid the shakes. I'm also a 110 pound female. So to answer your question there are many factors that determine whether a person will go through major withdrawals. It sometimes puzzles me too. I had to go to a medically supervised detox center I was that scared. Yet my uncle who drank at least a liter and a half of vodka for forty years stopped with minor withdrawals. You have made a very courageous decision to put down the bottle and live your best life. Congrats! May you see the many beauties in life.
- —Guest Marilyn
- I've tried before and got feverish. I know I've got to get this done. My wife is giving me the eye, like she loves me but won't tolerate being with a drunk for the rest of her life. And, she's giving me the tough love. And my job doesn't help, I'm in wine sales...
- —Guest Guest Dave
- Marilyn, I took your advice and spoke with my doctor, thank you so much! He wants me to continue tapering, I guess I was tapering too quickly. I'm doing well at 5 light beers daily and will go down to 4 next week. You were so right! I don't live in Canada but will get through this with my doctor's help. Congratulations on 9 months! You must feel wonderful. :)
- —Guest Blue
THE ONLY SOLUTION
- I drank heavily for 17 years. It became a 24/7 necessity. I needed alcohol every minute of every day. When I would stop, the shakes would come with vomiting for about the first 48-72 hours and then auditory hallucinations, then visual hallucinations and then it would be time to call 911 to get me to the hospital. There I would recoup. I say recoup because all the hospital did was get me to live through the physical withdrawal. I was not treated for my alcoholism, which consisted of symptoms such as fear, irritability, frustration, anger, but mainly fear. I just had to drink to get rid of these feelings and once I took that first drink I could not stop. I had to get rid of the symptoms that were bringing me to that first drink. The ONLY thing that helped with that was AA. I tried everything from counselors to psychiatrists to meds. After years of trying my hardest to stop I went to AA and asked for a sponsor. I have not had a drink for almost 10 years and my life is incredible.
- —Guest Rob f.
- I first found this site 2years ago and it helped me get through those first weeks of hell. Im thankful to say I've been sober since then with only a few slips. The people have changed but it's the same disease,same symptoms,fear and feelings of hopelessness. It will pass, I can't tell you how much better it will get and fast too, just don't drink, it will get better. AA has helped me a lot. You will feel better, that's when it gets hard, when your feeling stable again and forget the hell you went through to get there a drink sounds good, you will lie to yourself "I can handle it now" please don't drink and talk to someone. Its all so worth it. You are worth it. My life is so much better and I feel glimpses of real serenity and peace. Thanks to all here for the chance to live, love and try to help.
- —Guest Inspector
- How much did you guys drink before? I've drinking beers 5-6 nights a week for 15+ years. Got a little hammered a few nights ago. Felt kinda depressed and ashamed of myself being a grown man and getting so drunk. Decided maybe I should stop drinking. I was hungover the day after but no major withdrawals and no real cravings. That was 4 days ago. How much were you guys drinking to have that kind of withdrawals?
- —Guest Joe
- This site is a great site. Beyond the suffering that alcohol has brought to our lives, withdrawals that are painful, very hard to go through, relapses, there is a amazing sharing here, we all know how hard it is to give up drinking, and change our way of thinking, change our lives, sometimes our relations with others, starting from scratch or repairing the past, staying strong and keep going in the journey of sobriety. There is goal, the one to find again some happiness, freedom, some peace after years of darkness, pain, fears, illnesses; the list could go on and on. I just want to say the admiration I have for all of you to have decided to defeat the demon and make life a better life. It is possible, we can live sober. Life is worth it without what we all know, a nasty legal drug. Yvan.
- —Guest Yvan
Need to Stop
- The worst part about alcohol withdrawal is that I ALWAYS wake up around 2 a.m. and can't get back to sleep. I shake, sweat, experience auditory and visual hallucinations, but the thing that drives me absolutely nuts is that I CAN'T SLEEP! I was doing great for several months, but all of a sudden I just cannot get sober or stay sober. I'm on the verge of dropping out of college and losing my full scholarship. I don't know how this happened. I just can't drink anymore; my withdrawal symptoms are so intense that I can barely think. The only thing my brain is saying is to go get more alcohol. I'm trying to taper but it's not working, I always just end up drunk again. I don't have health insurance, so I definitely can't afford another hospital stay. God please help me, I can't take another night staring at the clock for 12 hours. This has to stop, but I can't afford any sort of treatment. So I just write aimlessly on my keyboard in the hope that I don't end up at the liquor store.
- —Guest So-Tired
My story to whomever it may help
- I started drinking regularly 25 years ago. Heavily 13 years ago, going through a divorce, illness and financial ruin. In that 13 years, I have ran the gambit from months of teetotalling to months of extremely heavy drinking. Sometimes controlling my drinking for a period of time, as well. A year and a half ago, I was laying in bed, in excruciating pain, and was forced to go to the hospital. The pain in my stomach was so intense that I could no longer medicate it with alcohol, bc, Advil, Vicodin, nothing helped. I had severe Pancreatitis that resulted in multiple organ failure, and went out 2 days after admission. The Drs told my family to make my funeral arrangements. I spent 3 weeks in ICU with a ventilator tube, a stomach tube up my nose, a catheter, tube in my rectum, receiving dialysis for my failing kidneys, and two IV trees with 16 different fluids, vitamins and medications. Dr told me it was 100 to 1 that I survived. I walked out 42 days after walking in thanks to a great God.
- —Guest Bill
- Hi all, Just wanted to share my story. I've been drinking heavily for the last 7 years. A typical week for me involved drinking 6 nights a week where each session spanned 8-12 hours. I'm in my early thirties, but alcohol already costs me my marriage and made my work near impossible. I also spent a lot of money and have consumed most of my savings because of of the drink. One month ago, I decided to call it quits as I needed to build up my savings, rest better and get over the physical pain and poor appearance. As I write this, I am very foggy headed and currently can't sleep more than 6 hours per night. It probably doesn't help that I drink lot's of coffee and smoke heavily - that addictive personality! I recall the first two weeks of my detox. I came down with strong flu like symptoms, threw up and had really bad diarrhea. Although the foggy head still persists, my body has undergone a transformation - now a lot tighter and look better. Almost free. Gotta stay the course
- —Guest Former Alco
One more time
- I am a 65 year old woman who has drank most of her life and has quit more times than I can tell..Lent is coming up and I will try one more time to quit for good.
- —Guest J
8 weeks sober
- Life is still as tough and i have had some major down moments in the last couple of weeks where things have seriously not gone my way but instead of flooring me and opening a bottle to cope, ignore, stick 2 fingers up at things, I have had to deal with the rollercoaster of emotions and wow! can you feel acute upset, embarrassment and disappointment without being buzzed all the time. This is fairly new territory for me and i feel like a child learning how to be. Some of the lapse of caretaking of my career have also become apparent, the one area i smugly thought i had protected - oh no! But somehow I am becoming more accepting of myself, not so deluded about my shape, age, abilities, nothing is being blown out of proportion. Disappointments bite but then i can deal with it and learn from it in the space of a couple of days - this too passes. Also people are now bored of asking me about my non-drinking. Except my boss who seems to be slowly choosing to do the same. Interesting times
- —Guest Louise
- Withdrawals are a devastating after effect of drinking the cold sweats, shaking, vomiting. I get were I am up for several days then start to here voices and when I close my eyes I see all kinds of crazy things cant sleep open My eyes and feel as tho I am in a whole different place very scary stuff been to the hospital several times it's time to quit with god on our side we can all kick the habit for good. Best Wishes.
- —Guest Jone
- I'm on day 7 and have shortness of breath insomnia and get depressed. It sucks I'm hanging in there wish me luck guys as I have no one but myself and god.
- —Guest Cesar